Mushroom Coriander & Lime Soup 🍄 🌿 🥣

You can use fresh or bottled ingredients for this, you work with what you’ve got. You can also substitute lime for lemon if you’d like.

Shit you’ll need:

  • 300g chopped mushrooms or equivalent in canned or frozen.
  • 2tblspns lime or lemon juice. You can also include the zest if you’re using fresh fruit.
  • 2tsp dried coriander, or equivalent.
  • 500ML vegetable stock.
  • 1tsp salt.
  • 1tsp powdered garlic.
  • A chopped onion.
  • 2tsps cracked black pepper.
  • 2tblspns olive oil.
  • 1tblspn of Worcester sauce.

You can either either enjoy this soup blended or chunky. Everything can go in all at once into your slow cooker for around ninety minutes on auto. It also works well served over rice if you choose not to whizz the fuck out of it, or enjoyed from a large mug if you do.

If you want a creamier soup, add a can of coconut milk, or your desired equivalent.

Potato & Cheddar Cheese Soup 🥔 🧀 🥣

This is pure comfort food, cheese and carbs.

Shit you’ll need:

  • Some spuds, or instant mash flakes. Use two large potatoes per person. I leave the skins on.
  • A chopped onion.
  • 750ML vegetable stock.
  • 1tsp cracked black pepper.
  • 1tsp garlic.
  • 1tsp English mustard.
  • 1.5 cups of medium to mature cheddar cheese.
  • 2tblspns of olive oil.
  • Optional: mixed herbs.

If you’re using instant mash this will take less time. If you’re using raw potatoes, you’ll need to cut them into small chunks, and shove them in your slow cooker with the stock first of all. I don’t feel you need to add salt to this recipe because the cheese will have plenty of salt in, as will the vegetable stock.

If you’re working with raw potatoes, add everything but the cheese and cook on auto for as long as they need to soften. If you want to keep the soup chunky, just add the cheese and allow to melt for a further half an hour. If you want a smoother soup, whizz the fuck out of the soup in a food processor before returning it to your slow cooker and adding the cheese.

If you choose to add herbs, add them with the vegetable stock, or you can sprinkle them on top of the soup when you serve it.

Croutons! 🍞

You cannot have soup without croutons. Well, you CAN, but honestly they’re the dogs bollocks so you should have bloody croutons.

These are not my croutons. They are a stock image until I replace it with one of my own. I need to make them first!

Yes you can buy them easily enough, but if you have some ageing bread left that isn’t good for eating untoasted, then make some croutons. I like sesame croutons, but you can make garlic and herb ones or just plain olive oil ones.

Shit you’ll need:

  • Some bread. Whatever you have left.
  • Some oil – sesame oil, olive oil, vegetable oil all work.
  • Sesame seeds or garlic powder & Italian herbs ferexample.
  • Yer oven.

Slice your bread down to your desired size. I like large croutons so mine tend to be more rectangular.

Combine your chosen oil with your flavour – so sesame oil mixed with sesame seeds and garlic powder for example. Or, olive oil combined with garlic and Italian herbs. You can use sea salt and black pepper, even add some balsamic vinegar into the mix. Just cover your bread chunks with it, and put on a baking sheet in the oven for about twenty minutes until they’re golden brown.

Serve with your favourite soup, or just scoff them as they are as a snack. They are also fabulous for chucking in a salad.

Cream of Tomato & Basil Soup 🍅 🥣

I found an unexpected jar of passata in my cupboard! I thought I had run out, but obviously not so HERE WE GO.

NONE OF THAT NEON ORANGE BULLSHIT.

Shit you’ll need:

  • One jar/carton of passata, 680g (approx), or the equivalent in tinned chopped tomatoes whizzed up to fuck in a blender.
  • 75g basil purée or the equivalent in dried/fresh. You can also use basil pesto here. Half a 190g jar should do it.
  • 1tsp salt.
  • 1tsp cracked black pepper.
  • 1tsp garlic.
  • 2 vegetable stock cubes.
  • 170g water.
  • 2tblspns of olive oil.
  • 200ml coconut milk, or your desired equivalent.
Doing its thing in me slow cooker..

Pour the passata into your slow cooker, and add all the ingredients except the coconut milk, or it’s equivalent. Stir well, and set it to auto for a couple of hours. Stir it every so often and when your kitchen smells fucking fantastic, stir the coconut milk through the soup, and serve immediately. Last time I made this, I’d made some croutons to go with it. NOM NOM FUCKING NOM.

Red Lentil & Potato Soup 🥣 🥔

I finally got me paws on more red lentils! I’m using up the last of me fresh spuds, although it’s totally fine to make this with spuds in any medium be they canned, flaked, frozen, whatever.

Shit you’ll need:

  • Some spuds. I used five medium sized ones, unpeeled.
  • An onion, chopped. Cheat and use frozen chopped ones like I do.
  • A cup of red lentils.
  • 750ML vegetable stock.
  • 1tsp salt.
  • 1tsp cracked black pepper.
  • 1tsp garlic.
  • 1tsp thyme.
  • 1tsp rosemary.
  • 2tblspns of olive oil.
  • A can of coconut milk, 400ML.

If you pre soak your lentils the night before, it will save time, but it’s not essential as you can just add time to the slow cooker.

Chop your spuds into small pieces, unpeeled. Add them to the slow cooker, and pour over the vegetable stock. Add everything but the coconut milk to the pot, stirring until things have melted. Cook on auto for two hours until the lentils have softened, and your spuds have gone soft.

You can either add the coconut milk for a creamier texture at this point and leave it unblended, OR you can shove it all in your food processor and blend until it’s smooth.

Scoff the bloody lot with some bread, and collapse into a food coma at your earliest convenience.

Simple Vegetable Soup 🥕🥦🌽🥬🥣

SooooOooOooOoOooo easy to make if you use pre chopped frozen or canned veg. It’s just as good as fresh, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Shit you’ll need:

  • 500g frozen or canned mixed veg.
  • A chopped onion – I often cheat and use frozen chopped ones.
  • 500ML hot water.
  • 2 vegetable stock cubes.
  • 1tsp salt.
  • 1tsp cracked black pepper.
  • 1tsp garlic powder.
  • 1tsp rosemary.
  • 1tsp thyme.
  • 2tblspns olive oil.

Chuck the lot in your slow cooker for two hours on auto. You can either eat this as a broth with the vegetables in solid format, orrrrr you can whizz its arse off in a food processor to make it a smooth soup. It will be lovely and tasty with whatever you want, bread, rice, or straight from a huge mug to warm your hands.

You can of course use fresh veg, but I wanted to keep this as simple as possible. I am not one of those fresh vs frozen snobs that happen to get right on my tits.