Chewy Peanut Butter Choc Chip Cookies 🍪

This is a very peanut butter heavy affair. The result is a peanutty chewy glory.

Shit you’ll need:

  • 227g of peanut butter. Smooth or crunchy is fine. Mine are made with crunchy in this instance.
  • 198g of sweetened condensed milk.
  • 1 egg.
  • 4tsp of cornflour, heaped.
  • 100g chocolate chips. I used milk ones.

Piss easy to make. Combine all your ingredients in a bowl, you will get a stiff but sticky batter rather than a dough. Spoon onto a baking tray leaving plenty of room between each, as they spread a bit. Bake for fifteen minutes in the middle of your oven on a medium heat.

Yields twelve, but it’s better to make them in two batches of six because of the spreading. These were a total experiment, I wanted to see if the ingredients would work, and well you can see they did. It makes a light but chewy cookie. The condensed milk negates the need for extra sugar. The cornflour keeps things from getting too heavy with the amount of peanut butter used.

Stuff in yer gob as desired. Belch in appreciation, and REJOICE.

Apricot & Stilton Biscuits

My brain is a very weird place. I dream very vividly, always have. During one of my more bizarre headfuck dreams last night, I apparently found the desire to bake apricot and Stilton biscuits. The British kind, not the odd American kind that seem to be scones under another name. This was a total guess experiment, and I love combining sweet with savoury so here’s what happened.

There were six, but I ate one so then there were five.

Shit you’ll need:

  • 1cup plain flour.
  • 1tsp salt.
  • 1tsp cracked black pepper.
  • 1tsp garlic powder.
  • Half tsp bicarbonate of soda or baking powder.
  • 1 large egg or equivalent in egg replacer (I used egg replacer).
  • 3/4cup of oil – I used 50/50 olive oil and vegetable oil.
  • One massive dollop of apricot jam about 2tblspns.
  • 100g Stilton cheese, crumbled.

Combine all your dry ingredients, making sure they’re properly mingled otherwise everything will be upset. We simply cannot have improperly mingled dry ingredients. Drizzle your oil in a bit at a time until the mixture starts to stick and go a bit breadcrumb-y. If you’re using an egg and not egg replacer, add it now.

Dump your dollop of apricot jam into the mix, and crumbled Stilton. I used to fork to mash it all together until it turned into a stiff (childish laughter) dough.

Six on me well used baking tray.

Scoop and press lumps of dough into a lined baking tray, making sure you use a bit of oil to grease. Bake for fifteen to eighteen minutes until golden brown, in the centre of an oven on a medium heat. Mine were ready in fifteen because I have one of those fan assisted contraptions.

They’re great for just shoving in yer gob, or eating with soup or stew instead of bread. This will yield twelve, but I only have a small baking tray so I had to bake them in two batches.